Complex Trauma, Shame, Co-dependency and Somatic Therapy

Understanding the Link Between Complex Trauma, Internalized Shame, Codependency, and How Somatic Therapy Can Help.

Complex trauma CPTSD often stems from prolonged exposure to emotionally or physically distressing situations, such as childhood abuse, neglect, prolonged medical trauma or chronic adversity. This type of trauma profoundly shapes one’s sense of self, relationships, capacity for emotional regulation and overall ability to trust and feel safe in the world. One of its most insidious effects is the development of internalised shame, which can frequently intertwine with codependent patterns in relationships. Understanding these dynamics and exploring therapeutic interventions like somatic therapy can lead to healing and self-empowerment.

The Weight of Internalised Shame

Internalised shame is more than feeling embarrassed or regretful about specific actions; it’s a deep-seated belief that one is inherently flawed, unworthy, or unlovable. For individuals who’ve experienced complex trauma, shame often arises from repeated invalidation, criticism, or neglect. It seeps into their self-perception, creating a toxic narrative of inadequacy.

This shame can manifest in various ways, including:

• Chronic self-criticism or perfectionism.

• Difficulty setting boundaries or asserting needs.

• Persistent feelings of guilt or responsibility for others’ emotions.

• An overriding fear of rejection or abandonment.

The Role of Codependency

Codependency can develop as a coping mechanism in response to complex trauma and internalised shame. It involves an over-reliance on relationships for self-worth and identity, often at the expense of one’s own needs and well-being. Common signs of codependency include:

• A compulsion to fix or rescue others.

• Suppressing personal emotions to prioritise someone else’s.

• Feeling “empty” or lost without external validation.

• Difficulty recognising or valuing one’s own needs and desires.

While codependency may initially serve as a survival strategy, it ultimately reinforces feelings of shame and unworthiness. Relationships become a battleground for unresolved trauma, perpetuating cycles of emotional pain.

Somatic Therapy: A Pathway to Healing

Somatic therapy offers a powerful approach to addressing the intertwined effects of complex trauma, shame, and codependency. Unlike traditional talk therapy, which focuses primarily on mental processes, somatic therapy engages the body as a crucial component of healing. Here’s how it works:

1. Reconnecting with the Body: Trauma often disconnects individuals from their bodily sensations, as a means of coping with overwhelming experiences. Somatic therapy helps clients tune into physical sensations, and learn to foster a sense of safety and presence.

2. Releasing Stored Trauma: The body holds onto trauma in the form of tension, pain, or dysregulation. Techniques such as breathwork, movement, and specific somatic therapies such as somatic experiencing help release these stored emotions and physical sensations

3. Develop a Sense of Empowerment: Therapy helps us create a greater sense of agency in our own lives. Somatic therapy helps us experience new empowered emotions and sensations at an intrinsic body level.

4. Building Self-Awareness: By observing physical responses to triggers, clients can identify patterns of shame or codependency and begin to shift their reactions consciously.

5. Cultivating Self-Compassion and Acceptance: Somatic practices emphasize gentle, nonjudgmental awareness, enabling clients to develop a kinder more validating relationship with their bodies and emotions.

Integrating Somatic Therapy into Recovery

Recovery from complex trauma and its ripple effects is not a linear journey. Combined with other modalities like IFS (Internal Family Systems), ACT, mindfulness, or group support, somatic therapy can create a comprehensive healing process. Key steps include:

• Acknowledging and Naming Shame: Bringing hidden feelings of shame to light diminishes their power and opens the door for self-acceptance.

• Practicing Boundary Setting: Recognizing and asserting personal needs is vital for breaking codependent cycles.

• Embracing Embodied Healing: Regular somatic practices and movement, such as yoga, meditation, or dance, reinforce the connection between body and mind.

Conclusion

Healing from complex trauma involves untangling the web of internalized shame and codependency while reconnecting with one’s body and authentic self. Somatic therapy provides a compassionate and effective framework for addressing these challenges, empowering individuals to reclaim their sense of worth and build healthier, more fulfilling relationships. Engaging with the body’s innate capacity for healing, we open the door to profound transformation and resilience.